Thursday, October 21, 2004


Jimmy Carter had brother Billy, the family embarrassment, the perpetual redneck, a guy Jeff Foxworthy could talk about all day long. Goofball supreme.

Bill Clinton had brother (actually, wasn't it half-brother?) Roger to occasionally pop up as an embarrassment. Slacker.

The media loved to ridicule both of them, but at least they were pretty far removed from having any influence over their brothers.

John Kerry has a different kind of problem. He has a wife who is in many ways the embodiment of Billy Carter. Loud-mouthed. Sometimes crude. Says the wrong thing at the wrong time. Arrogant, effete Eurotrash.

Teresa has inserted her well-manicured foot into her mouth multiple times this campaign season, but no instance has been as telling as her interview with USA Today.

A shit storm is still raining down, even though she's issued an apology. Those who were offended (including my wife and, possibly, verrrrrry many undecided female voters) see her statement as an arrogant, dismissive comment from a woman who looks down upon "stayathome" moms. I'm sure the Kerry campaign would like to hit the rewind/erase button, but they can't.

In battleground states like Ohio (where I live), I've heard a lot of women say the past day or two that they would much rather see Laura Bush in the White House than a woman who has such obvious disdain for the typical American woman.

After the dust settles, after Bush wins, I'd love it if the analysts determined Teresa's mouth cost John-boy the election. Of course, if that plays out he won't divorce her. Doesn't have the balls. Pussy.


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