Monday, April 21, 2003

IF YOU'RE RUNNING FOR THE "2004 DEM PRES" NOMINATION, YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TROUBLE WHEN A LIBERAL BASHES YOU

Mike Silverman, a self-described liberal, offered up his assessment of the current "2004 Dem Pres" candidates.

2004, just around the corner?

The first televised debate among the nine candidates seeking the 2004 Democratic presidential nomination will be on Saturday, May 3rd, at the University of South Carolina. The debate, hosted by ABC's George Stephanopoulos, will air on C-SPAN from 830p-10p Eastern. Unless you are a lame loser like me, you probably have something much better to do on Saturday night then watch Dick Gephardt and Al Sharpton trade limp bon mots, so let TiVo do the watching for you.

The candidates are:

Gov. Howard Dean -- My personal favorite. He's the Democratic John McCain, plain-spoken, honest. His courageous support of civil unions was true leadership, and he supports gun rights and health care reform, so you can shoot yourself in the foot, and then get it treated promptly!

Sen. Carol Moseley Braun -- The first of the "joke" candidates. I could run for President and get more votes then her.

Sen. Jonathan Edwards -- The anointed one. He's been raising the most money and has much of Gore's 2000 team working for him (and they did sooooo well last time around). I have no idea what he stands for or why anyone should vote for him, but I hear he has a nice smile and loves to kiss babies and pose for photographs.

Rep. Dick Gephardt -- Old ironsides, a paleo-Democrat from the days when Ted Kennedy was a serious Presidential contender and Tip O'Neil ruled the House like a King. If he were running for "President Emeritus" maybe I would vote for him, but this is a guy who can't even win the House back for his party. He should quit this silly Presidential campaign and get a job selling Viagra with Bob Dole.

Sen. Bob Graham -- I don't know a damn thing about this guy, which is probably a good thing.

Sen. John Kerry -- Yeah, he's a war vet, but his "regime change begins at home" shtick is a steaming pile of you know what. I'd rather hear his ideas for what he would do about terrorism rather then just hearing him bag on Bush.

Rep. Dennis Kucinich -- He's contending strongly with Al Sharpton in the "who is the biggest lunatic" challenge. Kucinich is so far to the Left that he might be on the far right, I don't know. He's never met a dictator he didn't fall in love with, and he's to the starboard of Bashir Assad on the Israel issue. He is the only candidate who is pro-life on abortion, and pro-communist on the economy, so at least he's entertaining.

Sen. Joe Lieberman -- A good guy. Matches up well with me on many issues, although he is way too moralizing on things like popular entertainment. Best foreign policy of all the Democratic candidates. He is good on gay rights also. He's probably my second choice after Dean.

Rev. Al Sharpton -- Insert your favorite "Saturday Night Live" skit memory here.


0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home